I am really sorry for you!
Believe me I am really sorry.I still feel ashamed and sad when I hear one of your songs or see your face in your pictures.I just can't stand them.You have been born in such a wrong place.I am serious.You were not supposed to be here. Even Victor Jara had a better destiny than you. I see something in your eyes that I have never seen in the eyes of the most honest people in this country. You are really brave enough to love your country and ignore the nation inside it. I am really sorry for you. The country which has always been a shelter for thieves , killers, liars and fakes ! This was not a right place for you. The wave of courage in your voice just makes me remember of "Le sacre de printemps" or maybe The ninth symphony . I know you confirm me too you were not born at the right place.You should have listened to your sister in that letter when you were still studying ; You should not have come! People only mention you as a fag who were always making fun of the most scared or the most stupid things ever created by God. I m really sorry for you.I still lay in bed and think about you and just try to imagine the scene when those bastards ,those animals ,those dirts were slaughtering you in your own kitchen and I can't tolerate that scene which you turned and saw your guests comming to you with their knives!!

"Father , forgive this people , because they don't know what they are doing" and the soldiers gambled for his clothes by throwing dice.



People: A very strange phenomenon.Disgusting and complicated.Never satisfied.Always talking.I think this is the best description for this creature.If you are working and serving them all through your life honestly and doing great and useful things for them ,again the most important thing for them is to know who you are dating, wh0 you are fucking and how much you are being paind each month.This is the truth.They never discuss about your deeds or what you have brought them.It's all about penises and pussies. Maybe because they can't think about anything more other that their miserable lives which is full of humuliation and disgrace. Their everyday routines with those "what to cook?" expressions above their head. When you get focused on their lives you will understand that their whole life is a big disgrace toward human history , their inventions and their arts. All they care is who is wearing what , and how does he/she look with those shoes and is he/she devorced or not. Those looking deep inside yourselves is dead in these days.Human character is at putesco .I told you before. Nobody has the right to judge about anyone , about their deeds and what they do .Untill they mean no harm to each other , they are free to do anything. So if your fucking religion is not saying so , I don't mind. Keep it next to your stomach. You would get old and you will die but still you'll find yourselves lost!
My advice to you better to use those ears of yours to listen to something worthy.Try to improve them not just to fulfill them with poisoning bullshits! and the second advice don't be so nosy about other's underpants.In any condition ,trust me you won't enjoy their sex!



I feel so relaxed today.Just great. Maybe it is because of that deep floating last night.It's strange to regret about what heppened and at the same time feel satisfied but when you understand every human being needs to empty all those heavy collected pieces which you carry all around in your life in one moment, then the reason for this calmness becomes much more clear. Sometimes it's so difficult to carry all of yourself on your own back. Sometimes it is hard even to tolerate your own style. Ok! Today's post is just happy and gay! took advise from my partner. Just today! but don't forget that only grayscale shots can improve your soul !!Anywayz enjoy these words:

If I were a swan, I'd be gone.
If I were a train, I'd be late.
And if I were a good man, I'd talk with you more often than I do.
If I were to sleep, I could dream.
If I were afraid, I could hide.
If I go insane, please don't put your wires in my brain.
If I were the moon, I'd be cool.
If I were a rule, I would bend.
If I were a good man, I'd understand the spaces between friends.
If I were alone, I would cry.
And if I were with you, I'd be home and dry.
And if I go insane, will you still let me join in with the game?
If I were a swan, I'd be gone.
If I were a train, I'd be late again.
If I were a good man, I'd talk to you more often than I do



That summer night I was a little kid which that happened.I never gonna forget although Never felt it directly.I remember that night I was a little kid playing on the floor in the kitchen at the same time my mom was cooking or something.It was around 9-10 at night I was so into myself and the silence was all over the house.We had about four or five tall windows in our kitchen and all of them were open at that time but there were some curtains covering them.
Suddenly came sound of a very very very big blast or explosion from outside. A very huge sound which I felt my blood pressure inside my small body rushing toward my heart.At the same time all the curtains in front of our windows pushed inside toward the ceiling ,actually they reached it.Two or three doors in front of our house got opened by themselves.And all of these happened in 5 seconds.I never heard a sound bigger than that.My mom was shocked just in front of me and screamed so loud. It looked that she knew what was happened , she rushed toward the backstairs heading the roof and I (was scared to death) just ran after her.When we reached the top I couldn't believe my eyes there : there was a huge red area just on the hills on the back of our home.It was all in fire.I was just shocked but my mom began to cry and scream suddenly .She became hysterical and was just shouting and calling many of our family friends who were in that notorious prison on those hills.She was just shouting and crying and I couldn't do anything but staring at her.I just didn't know what was happening.My dad came and hugged her and was just repeating to her :"they are not there! They are some other people!" .I couldn't understand what was just happening and they also never told me but later in school I heard :
" It was another group of political prisoners mass-executed together in large groups , They just exploded them!"
Even after about 17 years I can not forget that dark and bloody night! I can't ! I just can't at the same time I was playing with my toys on the floor , some people were crawling on each other to get more air and they didn't know in a few seconds, they 'll be gone.
For me it was just another brick in my wall.



He has always been there. So calm but so overwhelming. So deep ,dark and savage all through your soul. Sometimes you can not tolerate him but also can not live without him. He's always there.So much truth hidden in him that you can never put him aside. Sometimes he comes up suddenly and makes a sudden move which you can not even estimate his power.Sometimes he can enter so much joy in your life and sometimes can take you to the darkest sides of your soul.I can feel it roaring inside myself when my body's touching other's flesh.Makes me burn down through my bones so I can knock that flesh to the wall first then tear it apart by my teeth and make him so proud of myself. He never can put up with my routine life so he always stands right beside me and smiles in my eyes in such a sarcastic way which drives me so mad that more and more I hate myself acting so typical and mechanical. I never wish he would leave me alone but I wish at least I didn't have so much struggle inside between my human-side and him. He is the only reason I can be on the peaks or at least feel like that but someday I hope I can either leave him or the other side in order to jusrt relax and calm down.But how can I live without him? Can I live with his opponent forever? ofcourse not!
So he should not be worried .One day I'll join him and live with him till the last breath.That time I think I would be some worthy creature! Till that time I'll keep him warm and wild all through my veins! This Steppenwolf inside me!



1979 - A Baha'i Mother Killed and Her 2 Daughters Watching Her Dead Body in a Village named "Kata" in Iran

Just surfing for something I never found suddenly encountered some sites of this huge world which had a place for me. Usually I hate any picture of dead bodies and corpses (specially during these days of war) but this one has happened before. So much before even many of us haven't been born. It's strange inside me .The hate is growing all over my body.I can't even breathe. It's growing so fast and so hidden that I myself can not believe it. Many have said that when you get more far to a landscape you can judge it more precisely. I am angry.I weep so much in front of my monitor.So much.I can't stop it. I think in a few years or maybe now I would be able to kill someone . I just want to empty myself somewhere.It's all about humiliation . About getting deprived. About being insulted so much. I don't remember a year in my whole school time not to be forced to stand up and name my ideology and not get mocked and laughed at. That time I didn't know why. I was told just to stand up and name it very clearly. But now I know what was it all about. About making me more and more angry. More and more hatred toward my own homeland.Toward all those children around myself. All those friends keeping their distance from me. Try not to hear me. I am just a musician. I only create music! but music of mine is full of hatred these days. I end my word with a sweet memory from a executer :

“We tried saving their lives up to the last moment, but one by one, first the older ladies, then the young girls, were hanged while the others were forced to watch, it being hoped that this might induce them to recant their belief. We even urged them to say they were not what they were, but not one of them agreed; they preferred the execution.”

If you wanted to feel more of me click on "Participate"


2 Minutes Break

Keep it just here!

Don't move!
Don't talk!
Don't even fuckin breath!
Don't tell me what to do or what is right or wrong!
It's my turn to be understood! to be listened?
Who the fuck do you think you are?
Who gives you the right to tell me what to do to be a better man?
Who are those "better guyz" ?
Do you mean those fat-ass ,overflowed ,charity-and-PEACE-lover freaks?
What have I got to give?
What have I gained in your world to donate it generously?
To be born in the wrong time, wrong place and between the wrong people is your idea of being blest? being your selected servant?
What is this? some kind of sick show?
A freak show?
To make someone vomit what you have fed him with?or maybe what you haven't given him? to Bleed through his mouth just on your devine feet just for your greatness??!
Or maybe you prefer to put one of those golden gifts of yours in his soul to suffer more and more and more... to make more and more satisfied.
What makes him a special human-being? A gifted ,poor ,miserable ,loser of yours!
Don't worry im feeling ok.Even don't need you to ask.I can sort my things out.
Dont put on one of those sarcastic smiles of yours.Do you think I am not able to manage my own things?
Just don't fucking smile you bastard!!!

Run to the bedroom,
In the suitcase on the left
You'll find my favorite axe.
Don't look so frightened
This is just a passing phase,
One of my bad days.
Would you like to watch T.V.?
Or get between the sheets?
Or contemplate the silent freeway?
Would you like something to eat?
Would you like to learn to fly?
Would you like to see me try?